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  1. Shovel It In

From the recording American Dream

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About The Song

Some of my songs can take days, weeks or even months to complete. This song was written over three hours of inspired(?) madness after watching someone shovelling food into his mouth like there was no tomorrow. While that incident was the trigger for the song, the song essentially makes fun of my own constant attempts to lose weight. To be honest, I've given up the fight. My new motto is, "All things in moderation - and some things in excess!"

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Lyrics

Shovel It In

© 2003, Jim Lesses. All Rights Reserved.



I went to see the doctor and he said with a grin,

I have to tell you sonny, you are looking too thin.

You got to give up dieting and exercise too,

So listen while I tell you what you’re going to do. 

Buy up every carbohydrate that you can see,

Take it home and then you cook it up for your tea.

And if you think you don’t know when or how to begin,

Open up that orifice and shovel it in!

CHORUS #1

Shovel it in… Shovel it in…

Open up that orifice and shovel it in!

I went down to the supermarket there on the block,

The woman at the counter was in terminal shock.

‘Cos when I started buying - it was like a disease,

The first thing I ordered was a mountain of cheese.

I like potato salad so I said, What the hell?

You better send a truck load of potatoes as well.

The woman started screaming, and she said, It’s a sin,

I said, I don’t care - watch me shovel it in!

CHORUS #2

Shovel it in… Shovel it in…

I said, I don’t care - watch me shovel it in!

BRIDGE

A hundred weight of onions, and a keg of strong beer,

A cupboard full of pasta, leaves nothing to fear.

But a barrel full of cabbage and another of beans,

Is absolutely guaranteed to generate screams.

The only thing I never eat is Devon or Fritz,

‘Cos every time I do it always gives me the shits!

The last time I needed an industrial bin,

You should have heard them laugh when I fell right in!

(But I digress…)

Well, as you can imagine it was better than sex,

I bought a ton of pizza, and I still had some cheques.

Another ton of chocolate, and a barrel of cream,

Tonight, I said, I’m going to indulge every dream!

I bought three dozen burgers, and a vat full of fat,

If I run out of the chocolate I can always eat that.

This is one of those diets I’m determined to win,

So get out of the way, and let me shovel it in!

CHORUS #3

Shovel it in… Shovel it in…

Get out of the way, and let me shovel it in!

Shovel it in… Shovel it in…

Get out of the way, and let me shovel it in!

Get out of the way, and let me shovel it in!

Get out of the way, and let me shovel it in!